The Warriors Of South Park
by Third Chance
Summary: The boys of South Park have no idea what game to play at recess in fifth grade, until Eric Cartman suggests they play Warriors. Cartman leads AwesomeClan as Cartstar, while Craig Tucker leads FierceClan as Chullostar. Light Creek, M for language.


**The Warriors of South Park**

**A South Park / Warriors rip.**

_September 16th_

The bell, signaling recess to officially begin, resounded throughout the school. We all cheered, knowing very well this was the only escape from Mr. Garrison's class. Today, he was teaching about a famous person named Kim Card something. It was our first day back from their summer break, which was one of the most dreaded days of the school year.

We tore through the hallways, eager to reach the playground. The snow flew in all directions as we all dashed to go to the oak tree everyone wanted to claim. This certain tree was almost a "meeting" spot for all of us. Everyone wanted to be there, but no one knew why.

"So, what do you guys want to do today?" Token asked, clearly confused as to how 5th graders were supposed to play on the playground.

"We could do one of our old games," Kyle suggested.

Stan smiled, "Yeah. I always liked Toilet Tag." A chorus of agreement followed.

As always, the fatass had to jump in and ruin it, "Guys, we should play a new game." Eric Cartman smirked. He was largely hated by teachers and fellow students, but for some reason we all put up with him. "We're 5th graders now. We can't play _baby games _all our lives."

"King of the Oak Tree wasn't a baby game," Clyde broke in, frowning at what Cartman had said.

Cartman wobbled over to Clyde, slinging an arm around his shoulder. "Now Clyde," Cartman started, looking off in the distance, "Do you _really _want to be known as the kid who played baby games for all his life?"

"No," Clyde responded nonchalantly. Cartman eyes gleamed deviously for only a moment.

Cartman was obviously pleased, "Good, good Clyde." He moved away from Clyde and back to where he was originally standing.

Craig glared at Cartman, "So what _do _you want to play if all of our games – _that you played –_ were baby games?" The boy in the blue chullo challenged.

Cartman's expression changed considerably. We knew he was wearing the "Let-Me-Explain-Because-I'm-A-Genius" smile, "Good question Craig," Cartman kept up the sweet act, "But I think we should play a game called _Warriors_."

I nudged Craig, as Craig flipped Cartman off, "C-Craig I don't want to _ngh _be a baby!" I sputtered out, looking into Craig's eyes, pleading for permission to play.

Stan shrugged, "We could give it a try."

Kyle crossed his arms, "Fine. But if the fatass messes it up-"

"I'll kill him," Craig finished with a glare, his eyes defensive. Craig, Thomas, Token, Clyde and myself all functioned together. If Craig did something, we'd always follow.

"It doesn't -COCK!- sound like a baby game," Thomas added in.

Cartman's lips slid upward into a sly smile, "Glad you see it my way. This game is based off of a book about cats." He explained, continuing in his genius tone, "Some of you fags might say that sounds _lame _or _uncool_. But its not. The cats are wild and vicious, battling each other's clans."

Kenny raised an eyebrow.

"Are you all with me here?" Cartman spoke, not questioned, "Let's move on. In our case, there will be two clans since we don't have enough people for four. _I _will lead one of them. And it will be called... AWESOME CLAN!"

Craig challenged him, "Oh yeah? Well I'm going to be leader of the other clan."

"You're on, Tucker." Cartman sneered.

"My clan is going to be FierceClan." Craig shot back at Cartman. "So how do we play this game anyway?"

"Craig, you're such an idiot," Cartman muttered under his breath. "The first thing you need to do is choose your clan," He said, addressing everyone but himself and Craig, "Then choose your warrior name. And then we can do our battle!" Cartman finished triumphantly.

The popular response was either a shrug, smile, or high five to their best friend. In my case, I just stood there nervously, hoping Craig wouldn't engage in any wars.

"My name is going to be Cartstar, 'cause if you're a leader, you get _star _at the end if your name." The fatass announced, "The cool thing about being a leader is you can name your warriors if you want."

Craig put his hands on his hips and glared, "My name is Chullostar." He declared in his usual nasally and monotone voice. "Who wants to join FierceClan?" He asked, still in the same boring _but yet so.. intriguing _voice he was blessed with.

Thomas, Token, Clyde and I automatically raised our hands. There was no way in hell I'd pass up a chance to join _Craig Tucker's _warrior clan if this was the game we were going to play for the rest of the year.

"Okay, Thomas, your name is going to be Cursedmouth. Tweek -" The boy in the chullo looked thoughtfully at me for a minute, "You're name will be Twitchypelt. Token, you're Brownwhisker, and Clyde you're name is going to be Whinybitch." Craig said, smirking at Clyde.

Many of the kids on the playground burst out laughing at Clyde's new warrior name, while Clyde pouted at _Chullostar_.

"I wanna choose my own name," Clyde complained.

"Fine," Craig dismissed it.

"Riversplash." Clyde said, "I want to be named Riversplash."

We all gave Clyde a funny look, when Token spoke up, "Dude, why Riversplash?"

"Clyde means river." Clyde proudly explained.

Craig eyed the crowd, "Anyone else before the fatass asks who wants to join _AwesomeClan_?" Craig was mocking Cartman, I could sense it.

Bebe and Wendy exchanged glances before both agreeing to join. I felt jealousy stir in my blood when Craig nodded approvingly.

"Do you have names?" Craig asked, staring straight at Bebe and Wendy.

"No, how about you make some up for us?" Bebe had a gooey expression on her face when talking to Craig, same with Wendy. This was going to drive me fucking insane – not saying I'm not insane already. Jesus Christ, if you had underpants gnomes haunting your every step, wouldn't _you _be batshit crazy?

"Babyheart for Bebe. Blackcloud for Wendy." Craig gave both girls the once-over and turned to Cartman, "Guess you get the rest."

Cartman stuck his tongue out at Craig.

Craig flipped Cartman off.

"Craig, you son of a bitch!" Cartman murmured, glaring at the boy in the chullo, "Alright, so who wants to join AwesomeClan?" He asked with a little too much fake excitement.

"I-.. I will, Eric!" Butters spoke up with a wide grin.

Cartman rolled his eyes, "Oh god dammit." He said softly, "_Fine, _Butters. You'll be Butterfur."

"Oh boy!" Butters jumped for joy and ran in a small circle around Kenny.

"Stan, _Kahl, _Kinny.." Cartman looked at them pleadingly, "You guys _gotta _join."

"Sure," Kenny replied, the sound muffled by his orange parka.

Stan shrugged, "Okay."

"Dude... I fucking hate you, Cartman." Stan leaned over and whispered something inaudible to Kyle, "Okay, _fine._" The Jewish boy gave in.

"_Wonderful!_" Cartman said slowly. He always said thing slower whenever he was forming some sort of scheme. "Stan, since your name means stone, you'll be Stoneheart. Kinny, you're Orangepelt. And _Kahl; _You'll be Greenfeather."

"Why... Greenfeather?" Kyle asked Cartman. His voice was accusatory or disgusted, mainly just curious.

Cartman grinned, "Because of your hat, _Kahl._"

Kyle rolled his eyes.

"C-Can we start playing soon?" Butters asked, rubbing his knuckles together.

"Not yet Butters. First Craig and I have to choose a deputy. Wait a minute, our clans aren't even in number. _CRAIG HAS MORE!_"

Craig appeared to be relishing Cartman's mini tantrum.

"Pip, you gotta join AwesomeClan." Cartman begged, using his fake "sweet" voice.

"Are you quite sure, Eric?"

"Yes, now join _damn it!_"

"Alrighty." Pip agreed.

"Good, you'll be Smallfang. And Jimmy, assuming you'd join AwesomeClan, you'll be Deadfoot." Cartman moved on, "As I was saying, Craig and I need to choose our deputies now. The deputy is the second in command and they take over when the leader dies.

"My deputy is going to be... Orangepelt." Cartman said.

Kenny let out a muffled, "Woohoo!"

Craig flipped Cartman off again before saying in complete monotone, "I want Cursedmouth as my deputy."

I felt my heart drop, but let it be one day that I'd be announced Craig's deputy. I would try so hard and be the best warrior ever. Renewed determination to play this game soared through my body.

"Okay, now let's choose territory boundari-" Cartman was cut off by the recess bell. "Shit!" He cursed. "We'll play tomorrow, okay you guys? AWESOMECLAN RULES!" Cartman attempted to sprint towards the school, but due to his fat, he lost balance and fell down face first.

Craig and I laughed as we exchanged glances that best friends give to each other as we walked towards the school. Where would I be without him?

"Craig, this r-really does - _ERRGH! -_ sound kind of fun." I offered him a weak smile.

He grinned back at me, a grin that I loved but rarely saw. "Yeah, I think it will be. FierceClan will prevail." Craig whispered the last part under his breath but I'm sure he knew Clyde, Token, Thomas and I heard it.

It was only a matter of seconds before Clyde exerted a loud 'whoop' and dashed towards the double doors. I was in no hurry to get back to my classes, but ran after him with Token, Craig and Thomas anyway.

**-x-x-x-x-x-**

**Author's note: This story was written for a few purposes but I will only name one. I needed to write something to do with Creek. I love the slash pairing and read it nonstop, but never wrote anything to contribute. _This will not be my only Creek fanfic; _Since this one isn't Creek centric, I have something better coming in the future. I also wanted to tie in Warriors. No idea why but I thought it would be kinda cute if the boys roleplayed Warriors. Anyone with me? (Most likely not, rofl.) I don't blame you.**

**This whole thing might turn out to be weirder than it is already.**

**May I warn you that I tried to get them in character but they still might have ended up OOC? I'm so sorry about that. Try to enjoy anyway!**

**This is going to be rated M for "violence" and language, mostly. The boys have dirty mouths. Heehee. Especially Kenny, for anyone who has watched South Park before.**

**Name list:**

Eric Cartman – _Cartstar (self explanitory.)_

Stan Marsh – _Stoneheart (Stan means stone, I think)_

Kyle Broflovski – _Greenfeather (Kyle's hat is green)_

Kenny McCormick – _Orangepelt (his orange parka)_

Jimmy Valmer –_ Deadfoot (for his leg(s)?)_

Butters Stotch –_ Butterfur (for his hair)_

Pip Pirrup –_ Smallfang (Pip is small)_

Craig Tucker –_ Chullostar (his hat is called a chullo)_

Tweek Tweak – _Twitchypelt (Tweek twitches)_

Token Black – _Brownwhisker (Brown is his skin color)_

Clyde Donovan – _Riversplash (Clyde means river)_

Bebe –_ Babyheart (for her name pronunciation)_

Wendy – _Blackcloud (for her hair)_

Thomas – _Cursedmouth (for his Tourette's Disease)_

**Just to let everyone know, you should not continue reading if easily offended. **

**South Park is offensive, I assure you.**


End file.
